My Cologne posts are ever so slightly delayed with the festive season now being over BUT, on the other hand, ‘tis the time to start planning for the next one, during which I highly recommend you put aside a weekend for a cheeky trip to the world’s biggest & best Christmas markets in Europe.

With my overwhelming love for Christmas combined with one of my favourite girlfriend’s being German and currently living in Cologne, Michael & I took advantage of the fact that we also quite like her boyfriend and flew over for a long weekend of double dating Christmas merriment havoc.

I was very excited.

Thus when we missed our 7am flight (bearing in mind we arrived at the airport with ample time to make it, for once), were forced to rebook at an additional cost of £355 and wait 10 hours for our flight in the confines of Heathrow Terminal 3 (worst terminal ever?!), during which time the other male compatriot of our group, Dan (who had only taken a half day off work), came and went, it’s fair to say that relations between Michael & I were a little terse.

But, there’s nothing like bubbles to ease the pain.


With our rebooked flight then being delayed by an hour (seriously, you can’t make this stuff up), we eventually arrived in Cologne late evening and were in desperate need of a stiff drink(s).

After the fastest ever hotel turnaround, we raced to Bei Oma Kleinmann, a super traditional German restaurant to meet Dan & Tina.

The menu? Beer and Wiener schnitzel.


They really didn’t like the foreign girl who ordered wine, #awks.


Anyway, the food was FAB (and so cheap) and well worth the unwelcoming service.

First up, you’re served a cheeky salad to make sure you get yo greens in.


Before the star of the show arrives.


Wiener schnitzel’s the size of your head.

And pure perfection.


Serious noms.

After being harassed by an incredibly insecure magician who we felt too sorry for to ask to leave, we eventually left very drunk, ran around the streets causing mayhem, did a few star jumps to keep warm, conducted a quick supermarket raid (#Lindt4eva) and ended up at another German beerhouse that did naaaaat like me – if you are going to be so angry about serving wine then why put it on the menu?! And you still get yo money (and much more of it), so surely there should be smiles all round?! Very confusing.


Anyway, with a very long Friday finally over, we headed back to our hotel for a few solid hours kip in anticipation of the Christmas extravaganza that was about to begin.

It’s fair to say that I did not sleep well. Excitement levels were off the scale.

And then it was morning and time for the markets!